Saturday, October 22, 2011

A Message to Gay Rights Supporters

 This message is will contain the following:
1.)    Who exactly hates fags (hint: not me)
2.)    Who you’ve got me confused with
3.)    A clear way to tell the difference in the future
4.)     What responses are not helping your cause to intelligent people
5.)    The science behind the gay gene

This message is intended for gay people, bisexuals, trisexuals, pansexuals, asexuals, atheists, even straight people – just EVERYONE who is in support of the gay marriage agenda right now – IF and ONLY IF you’ve got an ear to listen.  I stand before you as a Christian and as someone who’s got a bit of an issue with some of you.  Some of you read that last sentence and have already decided that you don’t care what the rest of this message says, it MUST be crap because I’m a Christian.  It happens.  I forgive you.  Dumbass.

For everyone else, I’d like to clear some things up in this message, because some of you have been making it exceedingly difficult to believe the things that I believe lately.  Not difficult in the sense that I’m questioning whether or not God is real, but in the sense that it’s hard to be a black person around a racist.  It’s not necessary.  I aim to teach you the difference between a Christian and what I’m going to call a “Homophobic Over-Righteous Nut” or HORN.

The way I see it, there are three camps:
1.)    Those that are pro-gay marriage.
2.)    Those that are against gay marriage.
3.)    Christians.

The mistake is that you’ve largely accepted 2 and 3 as being synonymous.  That’s not QUITE true.  I know what you’re thinking.  “Aren’t there, like, whole Bible verses about homosexuality being a sin?”   There is, and it’s largely this that HORNs stand on when they toot themselves silly about “God hating fags” and whatnot.  They will pull those verses and what little science they think they know something about out as excuses for their political agenda.  And generally they will make themselves look like idiots.  Interestingly I haven’t seen a whole heck of a lot of anti-gays who AREN’T Christians.  Probably they exist.  We’ll call them HORN’s too, for simplicity’s sake.

On the flip side, you’ve got the PRO-gay marriage people.  In this camp I’ve seen people pull what little science they think they know something about out as justifications for their political agenda.  What’s weird about this group, is that its bandwagon has all kinds of people that have NOTHING TO DO with gay marriage.  The “everyone has their own thing” idea shines like candy in the eyes of all KINDS of other sexual behaviors that don’t even really require marriage.   Don’t get me wrong, there are PLENTY of regular two-person committed relationships straight and gay who are pro-gay marriage.  I just want everyone to be aware that it’s not just yourselves that are counting on you.  It’s all of relationship entropy combined.  I think it’s primarily because yours is the camp closer to not harshing their buzz.  :/

The third group is me.  And whoever agrees with me.  Now, I’m aware that there are passages of scripture that discourage homosexuality.  But it’s not like I woke up one morning and said “boy!  I really hate gay people!  I wonder what religion agrees with me!  I’ll join it!  Derp!”   Up until recently I hadn’t even given this issue a second thought.  I’m not really the sort of person who rallies a bunch of people to shout “everyone who does THIS thing is going to HELL!!”  No honest Christian should.  It’s not like anyone’s going to go “I never thought of it that way!  I’m a Christian now, WEEEE!”  After seeing “God hates Fags” written on a cardboard sign.  That’s one way to tell a Christian from a HORN.

So what am I trying to accomplish in this message?

I’m going to tell you the context in which I write this message, to better help you understand where I’m coming from. 

Turn on your television and wait for someone to talk about Christianity at all.  Or get onto a social network like Facebook or tumblr, and have a browse.  I haven’t gone a day in the past two weeks without Christianity being mentioned in secular media, so it shouldn’t be too long.  typically, what is said will be in the form of a jab.  Usually not even a well-executed one.  Here’s one I heard from a well-meaning comedian who was otherwise funny to me: “I don’t believe in a bearded guy on a cloud who grants wishes.”  ßHey!  Neither do I!  That’s not what Christianity is.  (Beard?  Everyone knows God’s rocking the chin-curtain!)  But lots of people eat up stuff like that.  The fact that a thing isn’t accurate means NOTHING, as long as it’s a wicked burn on a group of people who are out to take your rights away.  But to me - a Christian who is in no way your enemy - it just looks childish and moronic.  DON’T GET ME WRONG, I think HORNs are equally childish about it.  I’m not talking to them, though.  I’m talking to all of you who consider yourselves the more open-minded camp.
Tangentially, I saw someone on Facebook post something slanderous towards Christianity that was also totally inaccurate to what we actually believe.  I posted a comment that I wanted to accomplish two things; to correct some damning misconceptions, and hopefully to show that we’re not really as bad as all that after all.  I was met with no open-mindedness whatsoever.   Chiefly, I got angry shock-value sorts of comments.  Most of them more hate.
And I get it, I really do, A Christian or two bit your hand once. Similarly, there were some Catholic Christians in history that even got all messy in a war over religion I hear; in a way that I can safely tell you is NOT scripturally founded.  Think about me and those like me, or your Christian friends and say “these people are one step from sucking me dry like a vampire.”  Ideally, if we’re truly behaving like Christians, we are NOT giving you that impression.  Besides, Mormons already have the market on that (I’ve already posted a Mormonism blog if you’re looking for some fun).

For further context, Christians and I – we – believe primarily on this:
1.)    There is an omniscient designer and manifester of existence.
2.)    That humanity in consequence is part of that created existence.
3.)    That we were given free-will.  No big deal.
4.)    That this creator acts as a Father rather than a puppetmaster.
5.)    That – like a father – He gives instructive rules.
6.)    We have the propensity to disobey.  Free-will and all that.  Whatever, no big deal.
7.)    We sometimes will even act childish when we don’t get our way from God.
8.)    God just loves the heck out of us anyways.  Weird.
9.)    There’s that whole thing where He sent His Son to relieve us of the sin (disobedience to God) that collects on our heads that would keep us from entering His Kingdom (Heaven; the place that is designed to be our eventual and final Home).
10.) The Bible is God’s written word.  It says within the Bible, by Jesus Himself, that every last word is from God.  That means if you’re going to believe ANY of it’s from God, you’ve got to believe ALL of it’s from God.
11.) Most of the Bible does not even mention gays.  There isn’t so much as an example of a gay couple in the scripture.  It mentions homosex, but as an act, or a habit.  Nothing to do with sexual orientations as a lifestyle or identifier.  Categorizing people based on their bedroom habits seems to have slipped everyone’s mind I guess.   
12.) That the Bible mentions all of the sins we could possibly commit and how to avoid them.  A lot of times, it will tell us why.
13.) The Bible says that homosexuality is a sin.  Not more or less sinful than any others, albeit a more habit-forming sin.  Like most sexual sins.  Gosh, sex is so addicting, isn’t it!?

I can see from a HORN’s perspective that a legal movement based on something they believe is a sin, with a lot of atheist and other “everyone’s truth is the truth” jive attached to it looks REALLY bad to them.  It looks less like a bunch of people standing up for a cause, and more like a bunch of demons throwing their environment into the toilet.   Attacks from both sides onto each other serve to escalate the tension rather than convert anyone to their point of view.  (To anyone who thinks that’s the point, I’m going to call you childish right here and now) 

But those Christians who become HORNs over it forget a few things about Christianity:
1.)    Yes, homosex is considered a sin.
2.)    According to the Bible, everyone sins.  Try as they might, no one EVER reaches the Father’s standard definition of “completely free of fault” in this life.  Even Christians.  That’s why Jesus provided a grace-based salvation, rather than a works based one.  Because He just loves us so dang much for some reason.  Weird. 
3.)    Atheists don’t believe in God, so why in the WORLD would they be convinced solely by the Bible one way or the other politically?

So hopefully you’re starting to understand the difference between a Christian believer and a HORN now, so that you might be more inclined to point your hatred in the right direction.  Obviously, some of you are reading this and thinking “but you admitted that homosex is a sin.  I don’t see the difference still.”  The difference is in the priority.  You can actually distinguish one from the other reasonably well in a practical setting.
Those Christian friends you’ve got that haven’t seemed to make a fuss about sexual orientation (the ones that didn’t feel too alienated to hang out with you anymore) are probably not going to Church once every seven days to hear a guy with a pulpit discussing all the ways we Christians should give hell to fags this week.   They have their priorities in order.  Their goal as far as “being a witness for Christ” is simply to set an example of what it means to be in the family of God by trying to do the right thing while not worrying about death.  The idea is that in the event that someone is interested in joining the Family, they might be there for that person and have a leg to stand on about it; or at least they might not be pharisaic.  Unless YOU BRING IT UP, these guys probably won’t trouble you much.  Not that they’ll vote for you either, but they don’t deserve your slams.  What you say CAN get under our skin a bit, and I’ve seen that some of us have started to become gay haters just from the operant conditioning of it all.  Remember: You teach people how to treat you.

Those Christians that DO bring it up, pick an argument, they get all preachy, and offensive, and try incessantly to shove their “religion” down your throat, THOSE are HORNs.  And for the record, we’re not really fond of them either.  They are technically our responsibility, and we tend to try harder to kind of defend them - like you would stick up for your little brother - more than we apologize for them, because hey.. they’re showing an interest.  But I mean, they’re fully grown people, and it’s not like we can control them.  We’re not exactly a well-oiled machine with one human leading from a top-down perspective making sure we’re all acting in line.  Except for Catholics.  Nay, we have reason to believe God tends to deal with those sorts of things on sort of more of an individual basis.


A short rule of thumb: if they’re pointing a condemning finger; if they’re starting an argument, if they’re calling you a sinner or saying you’re going to hell, if they are more politically driven than religiously, they’re a HORN.


Well, you COULD act like a big shot in front of all your friends and slam them like normal.  You could also theoretically link them to this here blog and tell them to take it up with me (cause I said so).   

You could reprimand them in their own language too, like:

“You say you’re a Christian.  I understand that Jesus told you to “make disciples (learners) of all nations,” which is why you’re doing what you’re doing.  But it was my understanding that the WAY to be a proper Christian witness was though loving actions, and not through harsh words (which stir up anger).  Perhaps you should worry less about destroying sin in the life of unbelievers and figure out what your real mission priorities are.  I, for one, do not believe I am sinning.  So the only thing you’re doing by delivering your “God hates fags, gays go to hell” message is painting a picture of the character of God that is not only something hateful that I am nothing but repelled from, but also almost completely inaccurate according to your own Bible.  You are doing a disservice to Christians everywhere by introducing us to your God with this as His first impression.”

There’s one more answer, if you just want out of the conversation entirely.  Nothing disarms someone like an apology and a respectful attempt to understand them.  Like:

“I’m sorry I’m not voting for equal rights.  I don’t believe what you believe, and I’m not going to vote as though I do.”

My Father is not against you, and neither am I.  While I think God can probably take a hit, I’m not sure any humans should have to.  Please pick your battles.

Now, as promised, I will discuss the gay gene.

Because SEE!?  If GOD created EVERYTHING, then he obviously created some people GAY, and so now they’re SINNERS??  Duh, it’s not a CHOICE, if they’re BORN that way!!  So I can’t believe in such a God as that.  And even if he were to pop out of the clouds and say “here I am,” I would hate him!  It’s a legitimate point, or at least it would be if its premise were true.  I’ve already stated the way Christians believe God deals with sin (by sending his son to save us from it).

Lots of people have tried to convince me that homosexuality isn’t a choice, see, and that’s the way it’s painted in the media, and that’s the number one argument against Christianity’s take on homosex, and by extension, itself.  And they always say “it’s SCIENCE.”  However…

There was a study done awhile back, and it’s the closest I’ve seen a scientific study come to defining homosexuality as “natural born.” The data achieved by this study had been accrued by way of polling people about their bedroom habits, and it was mapped out on a curve chart.  I want to tell you the name of the study, but my google search for “distribution of gayness” was answered with pornography, and not the useful kind. 

The distribution chart illustrated people’s homosex tendencies as professed by samples of everyone, and it ranged from “I’ve only ever exclusively swung for the opposite sex” all the way to “I’ve only ever exclusively swung for the same sex” and everywhere in between.  The chart showed a pretty wide distribution for the homosexual tendency, which seems to indicate that there’s a natural occurrence of it. 

Obviously having a predisposition for a behavior that one has to act in free-will to exhibit does not conclude that one has no choice in the matter, or we would have a lot of people stealing other people’s stuff (because EVERYONE has a natural predisposition for the word “mine.”  Ask any five year old ever).   

Here is a synopsis of the rest of the SCIENCE that went into finding the “born this way” factor, as taken from :

“In the debate over the genetics of homosexuality, the data supporting a genetic basis are similarly weak. One study by Michael Bailey, a Northwestern University psychologist, and Richard Pillard, a psychiatrist at Boston University, found that about half of the identical twins (52 percent) of homosexual brothers were homosexual themselves compared with about a quarter (22 percent) of fraternal twins of homosexuals. But this study recruited subjects through ads in gay publications. This introduces a bias towards the selection of overtly gay respondents, a minority of all homosexuals.
Moreover, other results of the study do not support a genetic basis for homosexuality. Adopted brothers (11 percent) had as high a "concordance rate" for homosexuality as ordinary brothers (9 percent). The data also showed that fraternal twins were more than twice as likely as ordinary brothers to share homosexuality, al-though both sets of siblings have the same genetic relationship. These results suggest the critical role of environmental factors.
One study that focussed on an actual homosexual gene was conducted by Dean Hamer, a molecular biologist at the National Cancer Institute. Hamer found a possible genetic marker on the X chromosome in 33 of 40 brothers who were both gay (the number expected by chance was 20). Earlier Simon LeVay, a neurologist at the Salk Institute, noted an area of the hypothalamus that was smaller among gay than heterosexual men.
Although both these findings were front-page stories, they provide quite a slender basis for the genetics of homosexuality. Hamer did not check for the frequency of the supposed marker in heterosexual brothers, where it could conceivably be as prevalent as in gay siblings. Hamer has noted that he doesn't know how the marker he found could cause homosexuality, and LeVay likewise concedes he hasn't found a brain center for homosexuality.
But for many, the politics of a homosexual gene outweigh the science. A genetic explanation for homosexuality answers bigots who claim homosexuality is a choice which should be rejected. But to accept that nongenetic factors contribute to homosexuality does not indicate prejudice against gays. David Barr, of the Gay Men's Health Crisis, puts the issue this way: "It doesn't really matter why people are gay.... What's really important is how they're treated."

--J.m. Gatewood
Good luck.

No comments:

Post a Comment